Shop More Submit  Join Login
About Literature / Hobbyist Member Just me and the voices in my headMale/United States Group :iconfails-of-fanfiction: Fails-of-Fanfiction
Recent Activity
Deviant for 3 Years
Needs Premium Membership
Statistics 931 Deviations 18,511 Comments 32,040 Pageviews

Newest Deviations



Get fat!
I'm going to be returning to the thing I use :iconradieler: for. So if you see weird journals start to come up....Still me.
Mature Content Filter is On
(Contains: strong language)
Elton chuckled. “Foul! Repitition! Four-Love!” Emcee growled, they had been walking through the forest for hours, and in order to not die of sheer boredom, they have resorted to playing Statements, which would have worked fine, if Elton hadn't seemed to change the rules every minute. She looked around.
“How do you think Oz is doing?”
“Knowing him...” Elton shrugged. “He's dead to us. We're dead to him.” The woman stared at him for a minute, her companion returned the look.
“Do you not get the reference?”
“No.” They walked into a clearing, wide, the ground covered by a soft coat of snow, in the center was a stump..
Oz looked at the old man. “That your car?” They stood out of an old biker bar, off the side of a forest highway, a big sign in front of the parking lot said, in big letters; Tom's Bar And Grill  The old man was a tall man in his forties, wearing a leather jacket, which offered much better protection against the cold than his hoody. The man nodded.
“Eeyup.” He grinned at the ford pick-up.
“Had her for three years.” Oz nodded.
“I'm thinking about getting a new car. Is it any good?” The man thought for a second.
“I'd like to think so.”
“Is that all?”
“Yeah.” Oz said, “Thanks.” he walked into the bar, it was cramped, bathed in a neon glow of some old sign advertising....something. There was a pool table surrounded by several folks, and a TV played some football game. The Young man carefully made his way into the bathroom, which, for a bike bar, was suprisingly clean. There was a sink, a urinal and a stall. He sat on the stall, and waited. After a moment, Nowhere Man appeared before him. Holding a pair of car keys. Oz smiled, holding his hand out. “Atta boy.”
Emcee shivered. Her Macy's Customer service outfit was not mean to keep out cold. The duo continued to walk, coming into a clearing, in the center was a stump. Surrounded by a soft covering of snow. She blinked. “You getting any deja vu?” She asked Elton. The Man gave her a look.
“I'm sure It's nothing.” He said loudly. Emcee looked around.
“Eh, let's keep walking.” She said, hoping that it wasn't true.
Meanwhile, Oz felt miserable. The Car seemed to be completely useless. The dashboard's tools all seemed to be broken. The Radio was an utter mess, all static. And the electronic Clock stayed on the exact time it had been for the last three hours; 5:42 PM. He groaned, leaning back. He was probably running out of gas. He looked out the window, it was getting late, and he was the only one on the road. An hour later, he pulled into the the parking lot of an old biker bar, off the side of the highway, beside the enterance to the parking lot was a big sign in front of the parking lot said, in big letters; Tom's Bar And Grill  An old man sat on a bench. He was tall, in his mid forties. He wore a leather jacket and a cap. Oz felt like saying something, but decided against it. He walked into the bar,
Inside, There was a pool table surrounded by several folks, and a TV played some football game.  A neon sign reading something and A bartender was watching his glass. Oz looked at the screen, more importantly, the time; according to this, it was 5:42 Pm. The Young man ran outside, Oh no. Oh No. Oh No....
“Is that your car?” The Old man asked, Oz looked at him.
“Nice Car. I owned one like that for three years. If you ever think about getting a new car; I'd recommend just getting another.” He said. Oz nodded, quickly making his way to the car.
Elton and Emcee walked into another clearing. They looked at one another.
“Stand.” They spoke in unison, their individual Stands appearing beside them. Elton spoke first,
“Well, this is bad. How long do you think this goes?”
Meanwhile, Oz felt horrified. The dashboard tools weren't moving And the electronic Clock stayed on the exact time it had been for the last three hours; 5:42 PM. He didn't even risk turning on the radio; knowing that it would be all static. He had been driving for hours. He had to be running out of Gas. He forced himself to calm down, nothing was wrong. He looked out the window, he was the only one on the road, it wasn't anything. He-He was just...It-He was fine. Nothing was wrong. It was late. Everyone was home.
An hour later, he pulled into the the parking lot of an old biker bar, off the side of the highway, beside the enterance to the parking lot was a big sign in front of the parking lot said, in big letters;  An old man sat on a bench. He was tall, in his mid forties. He wore a leather jacket and a cap. Oz stared at him. Before slowly, reluctantly, looking at the sign next to the parking lot.

Tis the witching hour, of Halloween Night. And I have but one more story to chill your bones...Well, make them slightly cooler than they were before I guess, Well, I've been building up to this for a while anyhoo.

Excerpt from a local Newspaper: 





After weeks of unexplained murders, the ominous unknown killer is still on the rise. After little evidence has been found, a young boy states that he survived one of the killer's attacks and bravely tells his story. 

"I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night, For some reason, the sheets were alll sticky..." says the boy, 

"I saw that for some reason the window was open, even though I remember it being closed before I went to bed. I got up and shut it once more. Afterwards, I simply crawled under my covers and tried to get back to sleep. That's when I had a strange feeling, like someone was watching me. I looked up, and nearly jumped out of my bed. There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren't regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes. 

Hans: Vhy is he talking like zis?

They were bordered in black and... just plain out terrified me. That's when I saw his mouth. A long, horrendous smile that made every hair on my body stand up. The figure stood there, watching me. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he said it. A simple phrase, but said in a way only a mad man could speak. 

Hawk: Charades?

"He said, 'Go To Sleep. And move over. We're sharing a bed.'

Hawk: He then proceeded to say “It's Raping time” in sign language.

I let out a scream, that's what sent him at me. 

He pulled up a knife; aiming at my heart. He jumped on top of my bed. I fought him back; I kicked, I punched, I rolled around, trying to knock him off me.




That's when my dad busted in. The man threw the knife, it went into my dad's shoulder. The man probably would've finished him off,

Hawk: kid, he can't even kill you. Unless your dad is paralyzed below the neck and suffering from Lou Gerhig's disease along with cerebral palsy and advanced alzheimers...He's not going to be able to do much,

if one of the neighbors hadn't alerted the police. 

”Oh. I hear vague bumping coming from my neighbor's house. QUICK! POLICE!

"They drove into the parking lot, and ran towards the door.

Hans: Zis kid's got a nice house, how many people have parking lots?

The man turned and ran down the hallway. I heard a smash, like glass breaking. As I came out of my room, I saw the window that was pointing towards the back of my house was broken. I looked out it to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that face. Those cold, evil eyes, and that psychotic smile. They will never leave my head." 

Hawk: Okay, this kid's way too goddamn melodramatic. Someone beat him.

Police are still on the look for this man. If you see anyone that fits the description in this story, please contact your local police department. 

Hans: Okay, Cold Evil eyes...Might be glowing.

Hawk: Dark and Ominous.

Hans: Ja, So...Dark, ominous cold, evil eyes....Vell, zat's a helpful description.

Hawk: And a psychotic smile.

Hans:...Zis really narrows it down.

Jeff and his family had just moved into a new neighborhood. His dad had gotten a promotion at work, and they thought it would be best to live in one of those "fancy" neighborhoods. Jeff and his brother Liu couldn't complain though. A new, better house. What was not to love?

Hans: For one, the neighbor who would always mow his lawn butt naked except for ze gas mask.

As they were getting unpacked, one of their neighbors came by. 

Hawk: He brought libations to the outsiders as a peace offering from the tribe.

"Hello," she said, "I'm Barbara; I live across the street from you. Well, I just wanted to introduce my self and to introduce my son." She turns around and calls her son over. "Billy, these are our new neighbors." Billy said hi and ran back to play in his yard.

"Well," said Jeff's mom, "I'm Margaret, and this is my husband Peter, and my two sons, Jeff and Liu." They each introduced themselves, and then Barbara invited them to her son's birthday. Jeff and his brother were about to object, when their mother said that they would love to. When Jeff and his family are done packing, Jeff went up to his mom.

"Mom, why would you invite us to some kid's party? If you haven't noticed, I'm not some dumb kid."

"Jeff, You're a dumbass child." said his mother, "We just moved here; we should show that we want to spend time with our neighbors. Now, we're going to that party, and that's final." Jeff started to talk, but stopped himself, knowing that he couldn't do anything. Whenever his mom said something, it was final. He walked up to his room and plopped down on his bed. He sat there looking at his ceiling when suddenly, he got a weird feeling. Not so much a pain, but... a weird feeling.


He dismissed it as just some random feeling. He heard his mother call him down to get his stuff, and he walked down to get it.

The next day, Jeff walked down stairs to get breakfast and got ready for school. As he sat there, eating his breakfast, he once again got that feeling. This time it was stronger. It gave him a slight tugging pain, but he once again dismissed it. As he and Liu finished breakfast, they walked down to the bus stop. They sat there waiting for the bus, and then, all of a sudden, some kid on a skateboard jumped over them, only inches above their laps. They both jumped back in surprise. Presumably falling over on the bench.

Hawk: Nah, totally cleared it. Caught MAD air.

"Hey, what the hell?"

The kid landed and turned back to them. He kicked his skate board up and caught it with his hands. The kid seems to be about twelve; one year younger than Jeff. He wears a Aeropostale shirt and ripped blue jeans.

"Well, well, well. It looks like we got some new meat." Suddenly, two other kids appeared.

Hans: It's like ze veeping angels. Zey only move vhen you aren't looking.

One was super skinny and the other was huge. "Well, since you're new here, I'd like to introduce ourselves, We will be your generic bullies for this story. over there is Keith." Jeff and Liu looked over to the skinny kid. He had a dopey face that you would expect a sidekick to have. "And he's Troy."


They looked over at the fat kid. Talk about a tub of lard. This kid looked like he hadn't exercised since he was crawling.

Hawk: Yep. Everything checks out. That's Troy.

Troy: Up yours.

"And I," said the first kid, "am Randy Son of Marty. Now, for all the kids in this neighborhood there is a small price for bus fare, if you catch my drift." Liu stood up, ready to punch the lights out of the kid's eyes when one of his friends pulled a knife on him. "Tsk, tsk, tsk, I had hoped you would be more cooperative, but it seems we must do this the hard way." The kid walked up to Liu and took his wallet out of his pocket. Jeff got that feeling again. Now, it was truly strong; a burning sensation.

Here and Fanfiction Failure, we take pride in our ability to not make gay jokes about pre-teens.

He stood up, but Liu gestured him to sit down. Jeff ignored him and walked up to the kid.

"Listen here you little punk, give back my bro's wallet or else." Randy put the wallet in his pocket and pulled out his own knife.

"Oh? And what will you do?" Just as he finished the sentence, Jeff popped the kid in the nose. As Randy reached for his face, Jeff grabbed the kid's wrist and broke it. Randy screamed and Jeff grabbed the knife from his hand. Troy and Keith rushed Jeff, but Jeff was too quick. He threw Randy to the ground. Keith lashed out at him, but Jeff ducked and stabbed him in the arm. Keith dropped his knife and fell to the ground screaming. Troy rushed him too, but Jeff didn't even need the knife. He just punched Troy straight in the stomach and Troy went down. As he fell, he puked all over. Liu could do nothing but look in amazement at Jeff.


"Jeff how'd you?" that was all he said. They saw the bus coming and knew they'd be blamed for the whole thing.

Hans: Afterall, everyone knows that kids can't have knives.

So they started running as fast as they could. As they ran, they looked back and saw the bus driver rushing over to Randy and the others. As Jeff and Liu made it to school, they didn't dare tell what happened.

”We committed self defense.”


All they did was sit and listen. Liu just thought of that as his brother beating up a few kids,


but Jeff knew it was more.


It was something, scary. As he got that feeling he felt how powerful it was, the urge to just, hurt someone. He didn't like how it sounded, but he couldn't help feeling happy. He felt that strange feeling go away, and stay away for the entire day of school. Even as he walked home due to the whole thing near the bus stop, and how now he probably wouldn't be taking the bus anymore, he felt happy. When he got home his parents asked him how his day was, and he said, in a somewhat ominous voice, "It was a wonderful day." Next morning, he heard a knock at his front door. He walked down to find two police officers at the door, his mother looking back at him with an angry look.

"Jeff, these officers tell me that you attacked three kids. That it wasn't regular fighting, IT WAS KUNG-FU FIGHTING! THOSE KIDS WERE FAST AS LIGHTNING! and that they were stabbed. Stabbed, son!"

Hawk: Because, you know, Being stabbed in a street fight is just unheard of.

Jeff's gaze fell to the floor, showing his mother that it was true.

"Mom, they were the ones who pulled the knives on me and Liu."

"Son," said one of the cops," We found three kids, two stabbed, one having a bruise on his stomach, and we have witnesses proving that you fled the scene. Now, what does that tell us?"

Hans: Okay, he just admitted.


Hans:...Is he just rubbing it in?


Jeff knew it was no use. He could say him and Liu had been attacked, but then there was no proof it was not them who attacked first. They couldn't say that they weren't fleeing, because truth be told they were. So Jeff couldn't defend himself or Liu.

"Son, call down your brother." Jeff couldn't do it, since it was him who beat up all the kids.

"Sir, was me. I was the one who beat up the kids. Liu tried to hold me back, but he couldn't stop me." The cop looked at his partner and they both nod.

"Well kid, looks like a year in Juvy..."

"Wait!" says Liu. They all looked up to see him holding a knife. The officers pulled their guns and locked them on Liu.


"It was me, I beat up those little punks. Have the marks to prove it." He lifted up his sleeves to reveal cuts and bruises, as if he was in a struggle.

"Son, just put the knife down," said the officer. Liu held up the knife and dropped it to the ground.


He put his hands up and walked over to the cops.

"No Liu, it was me! I did it!" Jeff had tears running down his face.

"Huh, poor bro. Trying to take the blame for what I did. Well, take me away." The police led Liu out to the patrol car.

"Liu, tell them it was me! Tell them! I was the one who beat up those kids!" Jeff's mother put her hands on his shoulders.

"Jeff please, you don't have to lie. We know it's Liu, you can stop." Jeff watched helplessly as the cop car speeds off with Liu inside. A few minutes later Jeff's dad pulled into the driveway, seeing Jeff's face and knowing something was wrong.

"Son, son what is it? Honey?”


Does anyone know this kid's name?”

He's your kid!”

Do you know what his name is?”

I...Wait...Shit...Um, Son, why don't you tell daddy what happened today?”

Jeff couldn't answer. His vocal cords were strained from crying. Instead, Jeff's mother walked his father inside to break the bad news to him as Jeff wept in the driveway. After an hour or so Jeff walked back in to the house, seeing that his parents were both shocked, sad, and disappointed. He couldn't look at them. He couldn't see how they thought of Liu when it was his fault. He just went to sleep, trying to get the whole thing off his mind. Two days went by, with no word from Liu at JDC. No friends to hang out with. Nothing but sadness and guilt. And listening to Bullet For My Valentine. Just to compliment the sadness and guilt. That is until Saturday, when Jeff is woke up by his mother, with a happy, sunshiny face.

"Jeff, it's the day." she said as she opened up the curtains and let light flood into his room.

"What, what's today?" asked Jeff as he stirs awake.

"Why, it's Billy's party." He was now fully awake.

"Mom, you're joking, right? You don't expect me to go to some kid's party after..." There was a long pause.

"Jeff, we both know what happened. I think this party could be the thing that brightens up the past days. Now, get dressed." Jeff's mother walked out of the room and downstairs to get ready herself. He fought himself to get up. He picked out a random shirt and pair of jeans and walked down stairs. He saw his mother and father all dressed up; his mother in a dress and his father in a suit. He thought, why they would ever wear such fancy clothes to a kid's party?

"Son, is that all your going to wear?" said Jeff's mom. 
Hawk: Personally, I would have gone with the assless chaps.

"Better than wearing too much." he said. His mother pushed down the feeling to yell at him and hid it with a smile.

"Now Jeff, we may be over-dressed, but this is how you go if you want to make an impression." said his father. Jeff grunted and went back up to his room.

"I don't have any fancy clothes!" he yelled down stairs.

"Just pick out something." called his mother. He looked around in his closet for what he would call fancy. He found a pair of black dress pants he had for special occasions and an undershirt. He couldn't find a shirt to go with it though.

Hans: Nothing says fancy like a vhite trash look!

He looked around, and found only striped and patterned shirts. None of which go with dress pants. Finally he found a white hoodie and put it on.

"You're wearing that?" they both said. His mother looked at her watch. "Oh, no time to change. Let's just go." She said as she herded Jeff and his father out the door. They crossed the street over to Barbara and Billy's house. They knocked on the door and at it appeared that Barbara, just like his parents, way over-dressed. As they walked inside all Jeff could see were adults, no kids.

"The kids are out in the yard. Jeff, how about you go and meet some of them?" said Barbara.

Jeff walked outside to a yard full of kids. They were running around in weird cowboy costumes and shooting each other with plastic guns. He might as well be standing in a Toys R Us. Suddenly a kid came up to him and handed him a toy gun and hat.

"Hey. Wanna pway?" he said.

"Ah, no kid. I'm way too old for this stuff." The kid looked at him with that weird puppydog face.

"Pwease?" said the kid. "Fine," said Jeff. He put on the hat and started to pretend shoot at the kids. At first he thought it was totally ridiculous, but then he started to actually have fun. It might not have been super cool, but it was the first time he had done something that took his mind off of Liu. So he played with the kids for a while, until he heard a noise. A weird rolling noise. Then it hit him. Randy, Troy, and Keith all jumped over the fence on their skateboards. Jeff dropped the fake gun and ripped off the hat. Randy looked at Jeff with a burning hatred.

"Hello, Jeff, is it?" he said. "We have some unfinished business." Jeff saw his bruised nose." I think we're even. I beat the crap out of you, and you get my brother sent to JDC."

Randy got an angry look in his eyes. "Oh no, I don't go for even, I go for winning. You may have kicked our asses that one day, but not today."

WAIT-WAIT-WAIT-These guys have just jumped a fence into a six year old's birthday party, to engage in combat with some guy?...Why do people believe this is a true story?

As he said that Randy rushed at Jeff. They both fell to the ground. Randy punched Jeff in the nose, and Jeff grabbed him by the ears and head butted him. Jeff pushed Randy off of him and both rose to their feet. Kids were screaming and parents were running out of the house. Troy and Keith both pulled guns out of their pockets.


No one interrupts or guts will fly!” they said. Randy pulled a knife on Jeff and stabbed it into his shoulder.


Jeff screamed and fell to his knees. Randy started kicking him in the face. After three kicks Jeff grabs his foot and twists it, causing Randy to fall to the ground. Jeff stood up and walked towards the back door. Troy grabbed him.

Need some help?” He picks Jeff up by the back of the collar and throws him through the patio door. As Jeff tries to stand he is kicked down to the ground.

“Hey, honey? Should we do anything?”

Nah, never liked that kid anyway.”

Randy repeatedly starts kicking Jeff, until he starts to cough up blood.

Come on Jeff, fight me!” He picks Jeff up and throws him into the kitchen. Randy sees a bottle of vodka on the counter and smashes the glass over Jeff’s head.



Fight!” He throws Jeff back into the living room.

Hans: Vhy aren't ze adults doing anything again...?

Come on Jeff, look at me!” Jeff glances up, his face riddled with blood. “I was the one who got your brother sent to JDC! And now you’re just gonna sit here and let him rot in there for a whole year! You should be ashamed! I mean, I am fully aware that I am giving you a chance to recover and allow you to get a second wind by sheer righteous rage but I might as well just fill ALL the checkboxes for a generic enemy.

Jeff starts to get up.

Oh, finally! you stand and fight!” Jeff is now to his feet, blood and vodka on his face. Once again he gets that strange feeling, the one in which he hasn’t felt for a while. “Finally. He’s up!” says Randy as he runs at Jeff. That’s when it happens. Something inside Jeff snaps. His psyche is destroyed, all rational thinking is gone, all he can do, is kill.


He grabs Randy and pile drives him to the ground.

RULES TO MAKING HORROR # 682: The moment that someone hits a piledriver, or any other wrestling move occurs, it stops being horror and becomes stupid.

He gets on top of him and punches him straight in the heart. The punch causes Randy’s heart to stop. As Randy gasps for breath. Jeff hammers down on him. Punch after punch, blood gushes from Randy’s body, until he takes one final breath, and dies.

Everyone is looking at Jeff now. The parents, the crying kids, even Troy and Keith. Although they easily break from their gaze and point their guns at Jeff. Jeff see’s the guns trained on him and runs for the stairs. As he runs Troy and Keith let out fire on him, each shot missing. Jeff runs up the stairs. He hears Troy and Keith follow up behind. As they let out their final rounds of bullets Jeff ducks into the bathroom. He grabs the towel rack and rips it off the wall. Troy and Keith race in, knives ready.

Troy swings his knife at Jeff, who backs away and bangs the towel rack into Troy’s face. Troy goes down hard and now all that’s left is Keith. He is more agile than Troy though, and ducks when Jeff swings the towel rack. He dropped the knife and grabbed Jeff by the neck. He pushed him into the wall. A thing of bleach fell down on top of him from the top shelf. It burnt both of them and they both started to scream.

Hans: So...zese people just leave open jars of bleach on easily shakable shelves? I applaud zeir kid for surviving so long.

Jeff wiped his eyes as best as he could. He pulled back the towel rack and swung it straight into Keith’s head. As he lay there, bleeding to death, he let out an ominous smile.

What’s so funny?” asked Jeff. Keith pulled out a lighter and switched it on. “What’s funny,” he said, “Is that you’re covered in bleach and alcohol.” Jeff’s eyes widened as Keith threw the lighter at him.

Hans: Isn't he bleeding to death with a possible concussion?

Hawk: Hey, he could throw shit like no one's business.

As soon as the flame made contact with him, the flames ignited the alcohol in the vodka. While the alcohol burned him, the bleach bleached his skin.

Hans: See, zat is quality bleach.

Jeff let out a terrible screech as he caught on fire. He tried to roll out the fire but it was no use, the alcohol had made him a walking inferno. He ran down the hall, and fell down the stairs.

Everybody started screaming as they saw Jeff, now a man on fire, drop to the ground, nearly dead. The last thing Jeff saw was his mother and the other parents trying to extinguish the flame.

Hawk: At least let the Birthday boy blow him out. Jesus, have some fucking courtesy.

That’s when he passed out. Next thing he knew, he wake up in a hotel, basically naked, some girl in his bed,no idea who it was. And there was porn on the TV. "

When Jeff woke he had a cast wrapped around his face. He couldn’t see anything, but he felt a cast on his shoulder, and stitches all over his body. He tried to stand up, but he realized that there was some tube in his arm, and when he tried to get up it fell out, and a nurse rushed in. She was naked.

I don’t think you can get out of bed just yet.” she said as she put him back in his bed and re-inserted the tube. Jeff sat there, with no vision, no idea of what his surroundings were. Finally, after hours, he heard his mother.

Honey, are you okay?” she asked. Jeff couldn’t answer though, his face was covered, and he was unable to speak. “Oh honey, I have great news. After all the witnesses told the police that Randy confessed of trying to attack you, they decided to let Liu go.” This made Jeff almost bolt up, stopping halfway, remembering the tube coming out of his arm. “He’ll be out by tomorrow, and then you two will be able to be together again.”

Jeff’s mother hugs Jeff and says her goodbyes. The next couple of weeks were those where Jeff was visited by his family. Then came the day where his bandages were to be removed. His family were all there to see it, what he would look like. As the doctors unwrapped the bandages from Jeff’s face everyone was on the edge of their seats. They waited until the last bandage holding the cover over his face was almost removed.

Let’s hope for the best,” said the doctor. He quickly pulls the cloth; letting the rest fall from Jeff’s face.

Jeff’s mother screams at the sight of his face.


Liu and Jeff’s dad stare awe-struck at his face.

What? What happened to my face?” Jeff said. He rushed out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He looked in the mirror and saw the cause of the distress. His face. It…it’s horrible. His lips were burnt to a deep shade of red. His face was turned into a pure white color, and his hair singed from brown to black. He slowly put his hand to his face. It had a sort of leathery feel to it now. He looked back at his family then back at the mirror.

Jeff,” said Liu, “It’s not that bad….”

Not that bad?” said Jeff,” It’s perfect!” His family were equally surprised. Jeff started laughing uncontrollably His parents noticed that his left eye and hand were twitching.

Uh… Jeff, are you okay?”

Okay? I’ve never felt more happy! Ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa, look at me. This face goes perfectly with me!”He couldn’t stop laughing. He stroked his face feeling it. Looking at it in the mirror. What caused this? Well, you may recall that when Jeff was fighting Randy something in his mind, his sanity, snapped. Now he was left as a crazy killing machine, that is, his parents didn’t know.

Hans: Crazy killing machine huh? Ja, applying that to a twelve yeard old...Look, unless he's a clone of Wolverine, I'm not getting crazy killing machine.

Doctor,” said Jeff’s mom, “Is my son… alright, you know. In the head?”

Oh yes, this behavior is typical for patients that have taken very large amounts of pain killers. If his behavior doesn’t change in a few weeks, bring him back here, and we’ll give him a psychological test.”

Oh thank you doctor.” Jeff’s mother went over to Jeff.” Jeff, sweety. It’s time to go.”

Jeff looks away from the mirror, his face still formed into a crazy smile. “Kay mommy, ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa!”

Hawk: Wait until the painkillers wear off. He'll be singing a very different tune.

his mother took him by the shoulder and took him to get his clothes.

Hans: Vas he Naked zis entire time?

This is what came in,” said the lady at the desk. Jeff’s mom looked down to see the black dress pants and white hoodie her son wore. Now they were clean of blood and now stitched together. Jeff’s mother led him to his room and made him put his clothes on. Then they left, not knowing that this was their final day of life.

Later that night, Jeff’s mother woke to a sound coming from the bathroom. It sounded as if someone was crying. She slowly walked over to see what it was. When she looked into the bathroom she saw a horrendous sight. Jeff had taken a knife and carved a smile into his cheeks.

Jeff, what are you doing?” asked his mother.

Jeff looked over to his mother. “I am gay for the Joker. couldn’t keep smiling mommy. It hurt after awhile. Now, I can smile forever. Jeff’s mother noticed his eyes, ringed in black.

Jeff, your eyes!” His eyes were seemingly never closing.

I couldn’t see my face. I got tired and my eyes started to close. I burned out the eyelids so I could forever see myself; my new face. Now my eyes feel kinda dry....

Jeff’s mother slowly started to back away, seeing that her son was going insane.

Hawk: She just assumed self-facial-mutilation was a sign of being special.

What’s wrong mommy? Aren’t I beautiful?

Hans: Vell, he does have an army of disturbing fangirls who vrite about him getting tentacled fuck by slenderman, so, to a certain degree...

Yes son,” she said, “Yes you are. L-let me go get daddy, so he can see your face.” She ran into the room and shook Jeff’s dad from his sleep. “Honey, get the gun we…..”

NOTICE: We at Fanfiction Failure have given you a holiday gift by deciding not to make an abortion joke of this.

She stopped as she saw Jeff in the doorway, holding a knife.

Mommy, you lied.” That’s the last thing they hear as Jeff rushes them with the knife, gutting both of them.

His brother Liu woke up, startled by some noise. He didn’t hear anything else, so he just shut his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. As he was on the border of slumber, he got the strangest feeling that someone was watching him. He looked up, before Jeff’s hand covered his mouth. He slowly raised the knife ready to plunge it into Liu.

Liu thrashed here and there trying to escape Jeff’s grip.

Shhhhhhh,” Jeff said,”Just go to sleep.”

Scary wasn't it? No. No it wasn't. But, It is time for me to leave, Happy Halloween, from us to you.

Who says a horror game needs to make you feel helpless?

Wave based, friendly team game. Pretty damn fun.
Get fat!


JOJO's bizarre adventure -Kakyouin- by DADAIST-Gabriel

Okay, I like the concept, not exactly sure if the idea of a stand breaking apart to reveal it's user is original, but I like it. As for...


AnarchyWriter's Profile Picture
Just me and the voices in my head
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
I do commentaries on Fanfiction, I troll the creators and usually have a flamewar going.…
What Zelda Weapon Are You?
What Zelda Weapon Are You?
Hosted By Anime
What Is Your Anime Fighting Style?
What Is Your Anime Fighting Style?
Hosted By Anime
What Disney Villain Are You?
What Disney Villain Are You?
Hosted By Anime

What Is Your Level Of Sanity?
What Is Your Level Of Sanity?
Hosted By Anime
What Kind Of Villain Are You?
What Kind Of Villain Are You?
Hosted By Anime
Wait...I have high sanity yet I am a psycho? HAH!

What Genre Of Manga Are You?
What Genre Of Manga Are You?
Hosted By Anime
What Anime Personality Are You?
What Anime Personality Are You?
Hosted By Anime
<img border="0" src="…
What Type Of Music Are You?
What Type Of Music Are You?
Hosted By Anime
Why Are YOU Evil?
Why Are YOU Evil?
Hosted By Anime
Which Sherlock Holmes Character Are You?
Which Sherlock Holmes Character Are You?
Hosted By Anime

What Disciple Of The Creed Are You?
What Disciple Of The Creed Are You?
Hosted By Anime

What Is Your Arrancar Rank?
What Is Your Arrancar Rank?
Hosted By Anime

What Organization XIII Member Are You?
What Organization XIII Member Are You?
Hosted By Anime
What Is Your Level Of Randomness?
What Is Your Level Of Randomness?
Hosted By Anime
What Zanpakutou Would You Have?
What Zanpakutou Would You Have?
Hosted By Anime
What Type Of Movie Are You?
What Type Of Movie Are You?
Hosted By Anime
What Kind Of Fighter Are You?
What Kind Of Fighter Are You?
Hosted By Anime

AdCast - Ads from the Community



AnarchyWriter has started a donation pool!
16 / 1

You must be logged in to donate.

Journal History



Add a Comment:
jo-belle95 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Student Artist
AnarchyWriter Featured By Owner 19 hours ago  Hobbyist Writer
cnerone21 Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2014  Student General Artist
thsnks for the fave !!!
MoonlightShowers Featured By Owner Oct 24, 2014
Heeey I'm deactiving Deviantart I hardly ever use it so I'm not coming back but you are apart of Moonlight Phoenix on so talk to me there! I miss talking to you! Please talk to me sometime!

Your friend, Vap!
You got tagged. Just putting that out there: zueskillerproduction.deviantar…
godofwarlover Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014
Thank you for the fave
AnarchyWriter Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Hey, I've always found the Popobawa to be hilarious.
godofwarlover Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014
You find an incubus to be funny? The way it looks?
AnarchyWriter Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Hilarious, is the wrong word. I meant to say interesting. Though a one eyed penis bat is kind of funny.
(1 Reply)
NHarmonik Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Could you please do a Fanfic Fail of this?…
Add a Comment: