Chapter 17: Chapter 17
Jesus Christ: So what have you offer us today, my son?
Troy: A return to the Prayer Warriors!
Thomas Brown: Some very amazing. Three keys have been found so we are near to the end sadly. But fear not, I will write another fan-fiction named Kingdom Under Shadow, and a sequel to The Evil God.
Troy: Hey, Suzy, is it possible to get copies of those?
Jesus Christ: I will be delighted to read that. What else have you to say?
Troy: And I Swear to god, if it's one of your Tirades, I will build the world's tallest bridge and Jump off of it.
Thomas Brown: I wasn't referring to you Brasta Septim but the hackers Idoisy and Benry. If you cannot work that one out, then you are very stupid.
Troy: Let's see, I Flat out told you I was trolling you. You resonded TO THAT EXACT MESSAGE asking when You could expect the next draft....I don't think he can call anyone stupid.
None of your comments are valid.
Troy: And Niether are yours.
Jesus Christ: He will be punished in due time.
The Fourth Key
Michael gouging away at his meal, with his golden locks spread out. He was eating a massive steak, but not bacon, not that disgusting filthy shit.
Troy: YOU WILL BURN IN HELL FOR INSULTING THE HOLINESS OF BACON!!!!!
He looked up as he saw Ebony place two keys onto his table. She straightened the bun on top of her head, making sure her hair didn't fell out.
But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head: for that. For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be. -1 Corinthians 11:5-6
Troy: 1800s ladies and Gentlemen.
Michael took his hat off and stared at Ebony. "So you were able to get it from them?" he asked. Ebony nodded, with a big grin. Michael could tell that Ebony was pleased with herself. "I assume that is a yes."
"Yes, my master," she said. "I did the great work for God and it has made me feel better about myself. I even cleaned this school of the menace Harry Potter and that homosexual git Ron from this school forever. At this current moment Dumbledore and his satanic Army are burying them. At your order, I will be eager to dig them up again, cut their body up, and spread it across the school. It will give a message to those scum bags." She looked very satisfied at what she done, and Michael was glad of that.
Troy: Wow. Ebony was a lot less sane then.
Michael got out of his chair, and stood up, so that he could be higher than Ebony. Women should be submissive in front of men, for we were created first.
Troy: I give you....ANTI-LOGIC!
Women were created for our rib so they should owe us their lives for us being responsible to their creation.
Troy: So, how would they act if they were made out of trees instead?
And Adam gave names to all cattle and to the fowl of the air and to every beast of the field
Troy: Because he was f*cking bored!
; but for Adam there was not found a mate for him. and the LORD God
Troy: And yes. You're supposed to shout the first part.
caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs,
Troy: Violating the Bro Code. YOU NEVER STEAL SOEMONE'S RIBS WHEN THEY'RE SLEEPING!
and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. Genesis
"So what do you wish to be rewarded with? You have proven yourself equal with us as a prayer warrior, and very skilled at honouring our lord. So say whatever you want and I will grant it," said Michael.
Troy: STOP WRITING THIS SH*T!
"Please grant marriage between Draco and I. We love each other very much and want to grow seeds in our garden. This is the right time to grow trees that grow very tall,"
Troy: I think shes referring to Draco.
Ebony asked her, hoping that he would say yes. Michael thought to himself a minute or so, before nodding his head. "Thank-you," said Ebony, "You are truly magnificent. I will marry him now."
"You are welcome," said Michael. "But before you go, I need to tell you something very important. I fear I know where the fourth key is. Hermione Jean Granger was a very good acquaintance with Harry Potter and was at his funeral. I saw her sitting next to Dumbledore. It is whispered that he has sex with her, which is nauseating, that fucking paedophile. He is really old, and she is only seventeen."
Troy: Just like Florida!
"So what do you ask of me now?" Ebony asked outlandishly.
"After you marry Draco, and do it," Michael explained to her, "go to Hermione and get that key off of her, and bring it back to me. I don't care if it means sending her to the same grave as Harry Potter, but I want that key now, do you understand me."
"Yes, my master," she said. She then walked off. She met Draco at Hagrids Hut, which had an underground extension to hold church services. They asked Hagrid, who agreed, to marry them.
"So you take this women to be your lawful and god-fearing wife," Hagrid asked Draco.
"Yes, I will," Draco replied.
"Then I pronounce you Husband and women," said Hagrid. "You can now kiss your bribe."
And after they kissed, they went back to their room. Draco and Ebony removed skin from an onion. After that, they put Dracos noodles into Ebonys bowl, and Draco then planted some seeds into Ebonys pot, and then they laid on their bed for the rest the night. They were very tired from all that hard work.
Troy: You SERIOUSLY tried to write a sex scene? Wow. You are losing it.
My beloved put in his hand by the hole of the door, and my bowels were moved for him. I rose up to open to my beloved; and my hands dropped with myrrh, and my fingers with sweet smelling myrrh, upon the handles of the lock. Songs 5:4-5
Wash thyself therefore, and anoint thee, and put thy raiment upon thee, and get thee down to the floor: but make not thyself known unto the man, until he shall have done eating and drinking. And it shall be, when he lieth down, that thou shalt mark the place where he shall lie, and thou shalt go in, and uncover his feet, and lay thee down; and he will tell thee what thou shalt do. Ruth 3:3-4
Thy two breasts are like two young roes that are twins, which feed among the lilies. Songs 4:5
FISH!!!!!-A drunken Hawk.
The next day, Ebony went to Hermione Jean Granger room. She opened it, and saw Hermione Jean Granger putting make up on, something God forbids.
Troy: Now you're just pulling reasons to hate them out of your *ss.
This made Ebony spew inside her mouth, but to hide her disgust, she swallowed her vomit. It didn't taste all that nice, but she kept talking as if nothing had happened at all.
"Give me that key," Ebony demanded, "or be punished on behalf of the glory of God. Prepare to face justice!"
"Please claim down, you can have the key," she said. Hermione Jean Granger handed the key to Ebony Brown. "I want to become a Christian. Please show me the rightful path."
"Then go to Hagrids hut," Ebony said.
"I will go there now," said Hermione Jean Granger. And she left the room with Ebony, and they went to the Hagrids hut where they met Michael.
"This person wants to become a Christian," said Ebony. "Where should I take her? Should I baptise her for I know what to do. I am a prayer warrior, and should be well equipped to do things such as this." She hoped to do it, but she was wrong. Women are not allowed to baptise people. Baptising people is only reserve for men.
"I will do it women. Do not try and disturb a sacred ritual. I do not want you to ruin it, FOR GOD'S SAKES I WAS ALMOST SUMMONING SATA-I MEAN GOD!" yelled Michael angrily. He dragger Hermione Jean Granger to the lake and baptised her. "No go. I don't think you deserve it. I think you are lying. But because Ebony trusts you, I will give you another chance. Now go satanic bitch."
Troy: Our hero is an *sshole!
Thomas Brown: I put a lot into that chapter.
Jesus Christ: I can tell so, well done.
Thomas Brown: I will end at the twentieth chapter so I can write a sequel to The Evil Gods. Amen to All!
Troy: He's snapping!