Michael: Thank you all for being patient. I know you can't wait
Troy: Trust me. We could wait for a long, long time.
to red my increduble starry.
Jesus: Yey my son. Thoose who flame your story will be burnted in the firey lakes of hell where they will be tron apart bie evil biebers.
Hawk: I KNEW JUSTIN BIEBER WAS EVIL!
Troy: They really are beingsubtle here with the whole “trollfic.”
Chapter Three: The Evill Budhist
After awhile, we marched into Switzerlund. We planned on marcheting to Tibet and pillage and rape the Tibetans and force them into sorvitude,
Our heroes ladies and gentlemen.
Mark 6:11- And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear you, when ye depart thence, shake off the dust under your feet for a testimony against them. Verily I say unto you, It shall be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrha in the day of judgment, than for that city.
While Jerry was walking the streets, he heard an old beggar reciting verses from the Bibble. "How dare you you vile curr," he said and stabbed the beggar in the neck so he died a slow and painful death.
Only to find out that It was the pope on a business trip.
"What happened?" the Crusaders asked?
"This filthy beggar was reciting the Holy Gospel. It should only be recited by holy sinless men like myself.I mean, there was that whole “genocide” thing but who cares!?" Jerry said and people praised him.
the filty heathans were worshiping Buddha so we cutt them up and fed them to the dogs.
We marched into a Tubetan city and pillaged it. We tore down all the idols and crush them in little pieces by stomping on them.
"Watt are we to do with all the womun and children?" a Christian soldier asked.
"Kill are the children
Both: JESUS MAN!
but make the womun your wives and if they wont marry you, rape them so then they have to marry you."
Unfortunately, that was actually in the bible...Really. Deutronomy.
Jerry sad and a halo shone on his head,
Please fall on him, please fall on him!
"No please help me!" a tibuten witch shreiked." Don't let them touch me."
Jerry beat her violently. "Shut up whore." he awarded her to one of the high ranking christian warrlords.
Troy: Yes. We can add rapists now.
Numbers 31 15:18- And Moses said unto them, Have ye saved all the women alive? Behold, these caused the children of Israel, through the counsel of Balaam, to commit trespass against Jehovah in the matter of Peor, and so the plague was among the congregation of Jehovah. Now therefore kill every male among the little ones, and kill every woman that hath known man by lying with him. But all the women-children, that have not known man by lying with him, keep alive for yourselves.
So then we marched into another Tubiten city with the intent of killing them al (except the women who had not lain with a man. It's a sin to waste good meat.
Hawk: Femminists love him.
) so after we killed them all, Jerry took fifteen wives from the virgins.
However, God was not pleased becuase one of the women was actually a whore and struck Jerry down by lightning.
So they buried Jerry, king of Christians.
May he burn in hell.
Michael: See what sin does?
Jesus: Yes it is very bad.
Michael: But Jerry will be in heaven. Amen.
Jesus: About that....